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HopelesslyLost

Petition for Legitimation?

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My child's mother has always kept my contact with her EXTREMELY limited! Although we planned to have a child together, after our success, she basically ghosted me; began dating other guys, and avoided my efforts of staying in contact w/ her.

I wasn't even informed until a couple of days after my child was born to come to the hospital to finally meet our newborn. We were really young when our child was born, not even out of high school, so it was all so brand new,  and quite frankly, terrifying. Yet, I was really excited and couldn't wait to be a dad!

It's been nearly 10 years, since my child was born, and since I've physically seen my child at the hospital. My child's mother claims that my family is against her b/c she's Caucasian (and we're Black), but that's not true whatsoever! She's told me that I lack consistency and that's why she doesn't want me around our child...

I'm always having to contact other, mutual people or make new Facebook pages, just to get in contact with my child's mother. Every chance I get when I'm "welcomed" I save any and all photos, since my child's mother won't allow me to be around or stay in contact. Yet, she winds up blocking me/changing her phone number if I don't move as quickly as she'd like me to, and so, I have to begin again with trying to locate her new number or making a new Facebook page.

 

Our child's mother is now married, for the 2nd time, and also has 2 more kids. Before this current marriage, but after her 1st marriage, she and my child moved in with a boyfriend of hers for a few months. Her current husband wants to adopt our child. 

 I've been avoiding dealing with the courts b/c I've always felt it unnecessary and a waste of money, money that can go to my child, instead. I never signed the birth certificate, nor have I established paternity. I know the child is mine though. I don't want my child to be adopted by their stepparent...  I've been reading up on different cases and other legal information, and it sounds like even if I do establish paternity/petition to legitimate, I'd be denied due to abandonment of opportunity interest.

 

Is there any chance that I'd have a chance or am I as doomed as ever?? 

 

 

 

 

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To be honest, you chose not to seek the court's assistance in having contact with your child, whatever your reasoning, which put you in a very bad position now.  A court could have ordered regular visitation that was enforceable.  Of course, it would also order you to pay child support and to provide health insurance coverage.   You didn't do that.  You follow the mother on facebook but you haven't seen your child since she was born.  She doesn't know you.  She may not even know of you.  At this point should your child's step-father seek to adopt and the court finds him a suitable parent,  there's very little chance you can stop it. 

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18 hours ago, HopelesslyLost said:

I've been avoiding dealing with the courts b/c I've always felt it unnecessary and a waste of money, money that can go to my child, instead. I never signed the birth certificate, nor have I established paternity.

 

Sorry for being so blunt, but this is just stupid.  You spent a whole paragraph whining about how you barely get to see your ex-girlfriend's child, but you've taken none of the simple steps to ensure that you can see the kid.  "Unnecessary"?  Of course it's necessary.  Without it, the child is not legally yours.

 

 

18 hours ago, HopelesslyLost said:

I know the child is mine though.

 

No, you don't.  Unless you spent 24 hours a day, seven days a week with the mother around the time of conception, you don't know that she didn't have half a dozen other sexual partners who could have impregnated her.

 

 

18 hours ago, HopelesslyLost said:

I don't want my child to be adopted by their stepparent.

 

Then you'd better get moving on a petition to establish your alleged paternity.  To give yourself the maximum possibility of success, you should consult with a local attorney for advice and assistance.

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I’ve been blocked from her FB for nearly 2 years now, so no new photos, directly from her AND yes l, I know NOW how necessary it was and is to have involved the courts, AND I am 100% sure the child is mine b/c WE planned for our child, as in we worked at getting pregnant, set forth plans and names, plus the child looks like me & my mom, But I digress from that.... I will get on the search for an attorney and pray for a miracle!!  

 

Thank You both, & to whomever else chooses to reply. God Bless!

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2 hours ago, cbg said:

What kind of idiots were you both, PLANNING an unmarried pregnancy while you were still in high school?  Way to completely screw up your lives, bud.

Naïve idiots who thought they were madly in love, who wanted to have a kid & would get married, build a long life together ‘til death. 😖

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