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sisrob

Custody and Parenting rights

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My daughter was divorced 3 yrs ago. Her husband has 100% custody with 50-50 co parenting. He is an alcoholic, in his 30's his parents have taken care of him and his brother by bailing them out of whatever problems they get into including finding him jobs when he gets fired, paying for the house right before he was forclosed on, the list is endless. The 3 children are in the same school they started in. They are  13, 11 and 10. He was mentally abusive to my daughter while married to her. He was unemployed 2 1/2 yrs so he and my daughter had to live with his parents. After the divorce he lost his job for showing up to work reaking of alcohol then took a break and passed out in his vehicle. He never provided the children or my daughter insurance while his folks paid his. On and on. They go to Waynesville schools because that's where his folks lived and they got him a job there and made the down payment on the house that he almost lost. The kids stay with their mom every other week. His folks have now moved to Eminence. My daughter has found out they have bought a business for him will put in his name he will travel. They are having him file to take kids with him and they will be staying with them. If anyone asks they are "babysitting" while he is on the road. He said he can do this because he has full custody and she can only see them when he approves. She is remarried and her husband has put them in his insurance which is the first time ever they have been on anything but Medicaid. He tells her he will call police if she even takes them out of the county. Papers say state. Even tho he has full custody with them having 50-50 parenting on all decisions concerning them can he take them out of the only school they've known to go to Eminence where it is a less educational school? He said financially it's the only choice, but that's his folks paying! His folks have taken care and kept the kids almost 80% of the time when it was his turn. They buy the kids school clothes not him. My daughter buys too. He almost lost the house. There's more stories but not enough time. Legally can he do that? And even if daughter would bring in affidavits stating what he has done or not done?? I'm trying to find out for her and the kids. I'm not sure if he is playing mind games with her again because she is happy or what but I want her prepared. HELP,!!!

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Hi @sisrob

 

Welcome to the community and thanks for posting. In your post, you say that the children's father has 100% custody...but also that father and mother have 50/50 timeshare. Do you mean that father has sole legal custody, but there is joint physical custody with a 50/50 timeshare? How did father end up with sole custody in the first place? The decision making authority is likely spelled out in the divorce judgment or final custody order. Typically, if a parent has sole legal custody, then he or she has the right to make decisions about health and education.

 

However, your daughter has the option of filing a motion to modify legal custody so that she has an equal say in making decisions about education and where the children live. Your daughter may want to consider speaking with an experienced family law attorney -- she can use our Lawyer Directory to find one in her area.

 

Best of luck to you and your daughter!

The FindLaw.com Team

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He has 100% physical custody. 50-50 time share and parenting decisions lik schooling etc. he was always playing mind games with her so he said she should sign over 100% physical custody because he made more money and would cover everything but the would 50-50 time share and decision making so neither would have to pay child support. No she did not do anything wrong, she had just had enough of his mental abuse. She barely afforded a cheap attorney and his folks got the best for him. I'm not taking her side just because she's my daughter but also because I see what her mind set was before and when they divorced. She was intimidated by him and afraid and felt worthless. And still thought thre was no way he'd lie to her.

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1 hour ago, sisrob said:

Her husband has 100% custody with 50-50 co parenting.

 

"50-50 time share" -- a term you used in your most recent post -- is pretty self-explanatory, but it doesn't make much sense when used together with "100% physical custody."  It also doesn't appear that you've clearly told us anything about legal custody (i.e., making decisions about things like medical care, religion, education, etc.).

 

 

1 hour ago, sisrob said:

Even tho he has full custody with them having 50-50 parenting on all decisions concerning them can he take them out of the only school they've known to go to Eminence where it is a less educational school?

 

I don't know what "50-50 parenting on all decisions concerning them" means, but a unilateral decision about changing schools certainly seems contrary to it.  It might be useful if you could quote from the divorce decree (with any names removed or changed).  Of course, if the parent with primary custody is moving, a school change may be inevitable.  Assuming the cities mentioned are in Missouri, it appears the two cities are about 100 miles apart.

 

Your daughter should consider consulting with a local family law attorney about the possibility of seeking a modification to the decree.

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Just going by what my daughter says the divorce papers say 100% physical  custody, they do 50-50 timeshare kids one week with him one week with her. Then 50-50   

Parental planning where they have to agree on schools, major decisions. That's all I know. Was just trying to find out something to help her with the stress.  She's scared. He hasn't served her papers yet like he said. They start school on the 17th of Aug.  surely he wouldn't pull them out of school. I'm thinking he's hoping she will just believe him about not seeing them and scare tactics to get her to agree. He's mad she's happy married and after one miscarriage she's expecting again but ultrasounfpd last week showed a problem and she goes back this Thursday for another and she's upset about that. I'm just trying to help. 

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2 hours ago, sisrob said:

Just going by what my daughter says the divorce papers say. . . .

 

That's fine.  However, if what you tell us that your daughter told you that the papers say is ambiguous or doesn't make sense, then that's going to impact our ability to provide information in response.  :-)

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