Everyone I come in contact agree my x wife is overtly abusive. It’s definitely abuse, no doubt. It wouldn’t fall under domestic “violence”. Here this is the kinds on
have suffered at her hand.
I have been wondering for the last couple years that my x wife may have requested some domestic violence protections and I think she isn’t using them correctly. I know that I don’t play a big enough role in the world to actually have a conspiracy against me that includes all these government agencies, that cross state lines etc. I lost in court today. An absolute open and shut case that I never should have lost.
Ever since she and I separated these unexplainable, I’ll use the word “events” started happening and no one I know ever has advice, no one I ever report her to takes me seriously, and no matter what I do, I cannot change her as the beneficiary of my life insurance.
I suspected this before, but I didn’t assume she could commit any crime under the sun as long as I’m the only victim, and no one stopped her. I called the police, local, county and state. , I’ve called politicians… I have reported her to everyone there is and no one stopped her. I’ve decided there must be a time of a year to 18 months after she makes the allegation that I cannot report her to anyone for anything. She stole so much money of my checking account with ACH transfers, I was homeless for over a year. I’m U.S. Army (ret) and I could not depend on my check to get a place to live, because there was no telling how much she would take. I have a feeling she isn’t supposed to use these protections until the man figures out how they work.
I have tried to get help from everyone I can think.
She took my kids to another state and now the story I was told is no longer believable. Supposedly there is a CPS case against her, but they treat me like the case is against me. She clearly violated the geographic restriction, from our divorce decree, and even though I spent in the neighborhood of $20k hiring a lawyer in both states, there was something worded in her favor that prevented me from winning.
These types of “incidents” didn’t start happening until she and I separated. Our divorce decree had a similar discrepancy, ironically that gave her the platform she needed to begin terrorizing me. My visitation agreement was not written they way I agreed and it’s actually not even written legally. I spent 6 months trying to get a hold of the lawyer who did it, he finally agreed to meet me. I paid him $1,000 to fix the one sentence that was written wrong, but he never did. I exhausted all the grievance and complaints I could with the State Bar, but they never found any misconduct. I understand now, there was a domestic violence protection that made him do it the way it was done and he wasn’t allowed to tell me. But if I don’t figure out how to stop it, I’m not going on to be a dad anymore. That is what I believe has been her intention all along.
Honestly, a man isn’t going to admit to be being abusive any more than someone will admit to being a Nazi. However, I do know the truth. I know what happened and I know what she’s likely to do and say. She has 8 felony convictions in fraud and theft from before I knew her. I don’t have to say I’m not abusive. If I can talk to someone who will listen, hear me out and actually take me seriously, I can show anyone with some rationale that she is a liar. A career white collar criminal and then I’ll keep my mouth shut and let the lack of evidence exonerate me.
Please, if you aren’t the person who can help, direct me to who can. And if you’re going to suggest a “calling a lawyer” it’s a cop out answer. Since 2016 I’ve hired 7 lawyers to the tune of $50k. That honestly hasn’t been enough. All her lawyers have been on the tax payer, and I have not gotten one thing accomplished.
I spent enough time trying to get help with domestic violence protections abuse long enough that I’m well aware, it’s not considered abuse. I will tell you this, it is undeniable, every single person I know, agrees, after they hear the things she has been allowed to get away with, the way she controlled me when we were married, she is abusing everyone on the family. It’s obviously abuse, even my psychologist agrees, I suffer from many post abuse symptoms. The thing is my x wife is a tiny woman and I’m a large man. It’s impossible for her to physically abuse me. So, she finds methods that are as effective, but still not considered abuse. “Do as I say, or I’ll call the police”. If I had a disagreement no matter how petty, I just had to learn to keep it to myself or it would start a fight. Our fights ended one of 2 ways, either I just agreed or if I really pushed the issue, I would end up running from the house with an overnight bag. If she were unable to get her point across, she would call the police and they got her point across for her. I had an overnight bag, in my closet that was ready at all times. She called the police on me so many times, I figured that from the time she hit send on her phone I had less than 40 seconds to get passed the stop sign before the police got there. I always figured if there was an issue they would come to the hotel. Always stayed at the same one. I did eventually ended up waiting a couple times for them to get there. It was usually a couple questions and I would go to the hotel. She knew our marriage was over. She was building a paper trail so she could do all this, there isn’t even really a word for the way she abused me. I didn’t even realize it was abuse until I realized I needed protection from her. That’s when it became clear. There is no protection for her methods of abuse.
If someone doesn’t listen to me and offer some sort of help, my x wife is going to take my daughter, she is the only child I will father. I’m 41, I’m too old to start a family. I had my family. My x wife knew the entire time we were married that our marriage would not last a day beyond our 10 year anniversary. I realized she was waiting for the “10 year mark” as she called
it, and filed for divorce before she was ready. Our marriage was 9 years, 50 weeks and 3 days. She was so furious, she has been punishing me relentlessly ever since.
Yes. I am a big, ugly, scary looking, bald man, that is very skilled in many forms of fighting, and I’m proficient with many weapon systems. I did a combat tour in Iraq and now the aspects she used to fall in love with me, because I made her feel safe, she turned around to convince people she needs protection.
I don’t care how much she is protected. Put a battalion in her front yard and a division in the back. It’ll be a waist of money, because I’m not after her. I just want to have a relationship with my kids.
Thank you. I get to rambling when I talk about it. Please if you know where I should turn, I would really like to know.
Thanks for reading