Greetings. I would like some advice about what I have for options about my previous job. Let me give you a timeline as best I can.
I have been with this company for ten years. I was promoted to graveyard lead by the manager and this kid that worked there followed me to graveyard shift. He admitted he was a narcissist by telling people (myself included) he could teach them "how to manipulate women". This person also happened to be an absolute brat that really had something against me. Ever since he got in my life, I have not been myself at all. At first, it was pester, pester, pester (also a pest to me). Then a very obnoxious temper tantrum. He just isn't normal. He was not under any sort of special program or as a lead, I would have been informed. My landslide started just after Thanksgiving 2017 and went downhill to January 2018. A female coworker was applying for a new position in our call center and she was having an absolute blast talking to me about it. I mean she was glowing. That evening at graveyard, he threw a temper tantrum directed right at me about seeing it. He caught me completely off guard with his tirade topping it off with, "NOW YOU ONLY SEE HER ONCE A WEEK!" really emphasizing "ONLY" and he pushed his palm at me. I felt it. It was like a blow to the chest because he was sitting right next to me. I didn't even say anything to him. Nor did I email supervisors about it. She was also enjoying talking to another male employee. No attitude with him. Just me.
But I did want to talk to this other co-worker about it. She had temporarily changed her schedule to start later Sundays so I didn't see her those days. I was off at 6AM, she started at 6AM. The following Sunday, she changed back. I asked her if she would mind if I join her at her break and have a little talk about him to see if she knew a way to keep him off my back. She agreed. I wasn't prepared for what happened next. Her break was 8:15AM and no one was around. She came out shouting hitting me with both barrels about something that didn't make any sense. I already beat myself up over this but I was drawn into it with her and completely forgot what I wanted to talk about. I don't know how long we shouted at each other because it's all a blur. But she calmed way down and smiled and just said, "Don't worry about him. I know how to handle him" and walked back in. I stood outside for a couple of minutes dumbfounded and just went home. I said nothing about her except about a chance of promotion. Nothing untoward.
The manager came in early to talk to me about this. Then I told her about his attitude. If an employee had been on a call, their customer would have heard it. I demonstrated to her the most obnoxious part as stated above, she immediately said, "You should have said, what are you talking about,? you shouldn't judge him, he's a kid (28 or 29), maybe he has a crush on her so leave him alone..." changing subject several times until I forgot. She refused to let me talk. She let me know I almost lost my job for harassment and talked and talked and talked but the other coworker forgave me for it. Bless her heart. When I was drawn into it with her (I was her best friend once), I shouted at her, "Have I betrayed you somehow!?", she shouted back, "What are you talking about", "I'm still your friend!", she went off like a firecracker before she calmed down. I would like to know if this is in my file and the language of it. (I'll get to that later).
I mentioned to the daytime supervisor about him being a manipulator (AKA the rat talking behind my back). See, I was her best friend once before he started this nonsense. He emailed the supervisors about it since he saw a concern and my supervisor came in early again. Bear in mind, I never saw her until this started and when I worked days, we got along great. But she changed drastically. She came to my desk and said he's in the office and there is some confusion about something. I followed her in and she said to him (leaving names out), "I just wanted to make sure you were just picking on him when you told him he only sees her once a week". At "only", she lightly flicked her wrist with her hand held low. (I had forgotten about his attitude at this point and didn't dare bring it back up). He bowed his head like in submission pointing to he chest he said in a sheepish tone, "I said I only see her once a week". I kid you not, in a coddling voice she said, "That's okay. You can go now". That's called "feigned confusion" or "feigned innocence". An effective way of lying to someone's face. It worked too. I started to leave. "NO! WE ARE NOT DONE! SIT DOWN!" So I sat back down. She brought up me mentioning he is a narcissist and harassed me hard about it. Her verbal beat down was very stressful and seemed like it lasted forever going on about "mind control". I was trying to say, "The word he used was manipulate" but she wouldn't let me answer. They both lied to my face but I couldn't tell the truth. It was so stressful, I ended up going to the ER. It was just heart palpitations but it kind of worried me since I'm 55 years old. I didn't notify her supervisor of this. I know I should have but I was worried it might pass onto her, the next person, the next person, so on and so on.
A couple of days later, she came in early again. She came in early to try to talk to me into quitting because I use mass transit and the company was moving in six months. It was a walk from the bus line but it didn't seem like much. I told her this and said I already planned a trial run and I would let her know. Then she brought up the falling out with this other gal and I. She pretended to give me advice on how to fix things with her. Like an idiot, I followed her advice. What I did (in fear of another shouting match), I just wrote her a note since I told her to block me on messenger. It was thoughtful. Nothing bad and the next day, I got the call. It was my supe and HR on the line. HR said first, "We're letting you go because you were trying to be her friend (whatever that means) and without missing a beat, my supervisor said, "And you said he could brainwash women!" with a hateful tone.
To wrap up, I would like to know what is in my file. I was not "trying to be her friend" and the word he used was, manipulate. It turns out I was manipulated. I was so bad for a little while, I had to go through counseling and I called HR about three months later to request to see my personnel file. They said I would need to talk to a police officer? So I did and he said I should contact BOLI (Labor Bureau), I contacted BOLI and they said since I am not of a protected class, they couldn't help me. Is there any avenue I could take to set the record straight? Does it count as harassment for being drawn into an argument and is that in my record and would they tell this to future employers? I reiterate, ten years and I felt terrible about that.