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Everything posted by anexwifePA

  1. He's not holding out. I see his checks. Normal taxes are deducted, NO health insurance, NO 401k, etc. $10 an hour. He will literally come home with $149.69 while child support took $149.70- a penny more. It's the strangest thing. Like a smack to the face - "we get one more penny than you do!" And since they can't take the full $171 for the week (I think there are limits on how much they can garnish) the remaining $20 bucks or so just gets added to arrears. I've looked for help with legal aid. The ones I've contacted help mothers, not fathers. I was even going to lend him funds for an attorney but the attorney said he didn't really need one when we consulted with one. First time at court, judge was mean. Didnt let him speak. Assumed he wasn't paying child support. He had to show proof of money order stubs for two years. Anything he couldn't prove just got put in arrears with the hospital bills. Which is paid now like I said. Thing is, he is still also paying for child care of $40 week for a child who hasn't been in child care for years. They just really don't want to give him a break. And he's not underemployed. He's been in the $9-12 range the 18 years I've known him. He had one job at $16 an hour because her family got him the job. And he's been screwed ever since as the support was based on that amt. just looking for advice from fathers who have found relief on their own through honest means. He's not trying to take from his child. He's trying to live and provide for two children. He hasn't met a judge yet who is willing to look at the facts and judge fairly.
  2. My ex husband is drowning. He and I share our son, but he hasn't been able to support him in years as he can't support himself due to support of second child. After things went south with his second wife, he signed divorce papers agreeing to pay $500 a month. He was making $16 an hour at the time. He worked with her family and a few months later, he was fired. No shocker as he was now hated. He continued to pay the $500 from his unemployment check. Fast forward a few years later, he requested modification as he was making $11 an hour. He received the run around and was ultimately denied. To make matters worse, the court hit him with over $3,000 on back pay for hospital bills she was hoarding-increasing support to $736 a month. When he lost his job last year, he went to court again. They denied him saying loss of job is not an excuse. He's now been working the past six months at a college making $10 an hour. He comes home with $149 a week. He's so poor, he can't afford his rent. He borrows money from his mother knowing he can never pay her back. Bless her heart as she knows this as well. I help him as well. I told him he needs to go back to court and request modification again. Does anyone have any great advice on how to do this without a lawyer? How can he make the court see that he can't afford it. For past six months, they can't even get the full $736 from his checks. Arrears keep applying. I let him claim our son on his taxes last year to help him get ahead and NYC took that check. $3,000 went right to her. The mom is nasty so agreements do not work. He can't even see his kid. She makes 3x the money he does, but she doesn't care. And the courts don't care about the son we have together that suffers. He can't even buy our son a Big Mac. So good advice is needed to help this man stand on his own feet. Do you know that food stamps won't count child support unless your gross meets their requirements first? Or that public housing doesn't take child support into consideration for a child that doesn't live in housing? Rent is still 30% of gross. Men should not have to suffer like this. If this is no longer your money, why do government programs include it in your gross? The only advice I have for my son is: don't have children. Which is really sad, but he sees his father suffering and becomes enraged asking, "how can they do that?!" His teacher recently committed suicide due to the exwife taking him back to court. How can my ex plead with the court to lessen his support order so that he can survive?
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