"Ist it will be pro se and I know my ex husband will have an attorney (parents will pay for one) "
Since it is his failure to pay alimony that brought you to court in the first place, you could hire an attorney and request in the hearing that your ex pay for it. It is not certain that you will win that, but it is likely and definitely worth a try. I would suggest going for a consultation at the very least.
"2nd, he has paid something every month, but less than half and is now up to 25,000 dollars so I think it's gotten so high the judge might reduce it"
The judge will not reduce his alimony solely because he is behind - that's just silly.
It may be reduced (going forward) if he can show a "significant change in circumstances" (decrease in his income), but he still has to pay what he is behind. Keep in mind that your contempt motion is for his arrears - he would have to file a separate motion to reduce the amount of alimony he is required to pay. It will not get reduced just because you took him to court for unpaid alimony. (It's not like the judge is going to look at the original order and just say "oh, that's too much money for him to pay. Let's cut it down to make it easier for him...")
"3rd, he started his own company, an LLC so he won't have income to apply my Income Deduction Order or recordable income for that matter to show the judge"
Since your ex chose to start his own company (and have no income), the judge likely will not reduce your alimony because of his decision. Again, he would have to file his own motion to request a reduction in alimony.
"I waited a year, and now I have gone through my savings"
Unless you were getting many thousands in alimony each month, $25,000 in arrears is huge. Seems to me you should have filed for contempt a long, long time ago.
