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Ex-girlfriend traveling out of the country.


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#1 DarkSin

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Posted 07 February 2013 - 09:22 AM

Hello,

Let me start with explaining the situation.
I used to live with "Jane" for a few years and we had a baby together. Even though we never got married, my name appears as the father of the baby in the birth certificate.
My ex has been avoiding my calls and I've barely seen my child after we separated (about 4 months ago). After I get some money I will start a lawsuit in order to put myself through child support and to set a visitation schedule.
Now this is where my question comes; I found out that my ex is traveling out of the country at the end of February, she has not told me anything about it but I can say that the information is 100% accurate. I know that she cannot take away my child without my permission so most likely she will leave the baby with someone else.
Is there anything I can do in order to keep the baby with me while she is gone?
Could this be considered as if she was abandoning the baby?
Can I get with the cops since the child would not be staying with any or the parents?
If it helps any, my ex would be out of the country for at least 2 weeks.

Any help would be greatly appreciated!
Thanks.

#2 Ted_from_Texas

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Posted 07 February 2013 - 12:21 PM

Until your paternity is legally established (your name on the birth certificate might not be enought to establish paternity) and a custody order is in place, you have no legal grounds to seek possession of your child in the mother's absence. You may of course request that the child be left with you, but it's the mother's call whether or not to grant your request.

Leaving a child temporarily in the care of a responsible adult (friend or relative) does not constitute abandonment.

The cops can only help you if there's reason to believe a crime has been committed. Based on the facts presented in your message, there is no crime and law enforcement officials should, and probably will, refuse to get involved.

#3 FindLaw_Amir

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Posted 07 February 2013 - 12:30 PM

To learn more about this subject matter, you may want to visit the Family Law Center as a good resource.
FindLaw's Legal Heads-Up! newsletter can provide you with the legal resources you need to make informed decisions when law touches aspects of your everyday life.

#4 pg1067

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Posted 08 February 2013 - 07:14 AM

I know that she cannot take away my child without my permission so most likely she will leave the baby with someone else.


What makes you think "she cannot take away [the] child without your permission? While I'm not sure exactly what you mean by that, it does not sound like you have any parental rights regarding the child at this time. Since the child was born out of wedlock, the mother has all parental rights until such time as paternity is established and a court enters an order allocating rights between mother and father. That your name appears on the birth certificate is not enough.


Is there anything I can do in order to keep the baby with me while she is gone?


You can look into a possible emergency petition to establish paternity and have a temporary custody order put in place.


Could this be considered as if she was abandoning the baby?


I don't really understand this question. You're free to "consider" it anything you like. However, there's nothing legally wrongful with a parent taking a trip and leaving her child in the care of a competent adult.


Hello,

Let me start with explaining the situation.
Can I get with the cops since the child would not be staying with any or the parents?


"Get with the cops"? There's nothing even remotely criminal about anything you described.

#5 DarkSin

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Posted 08 February 2013 - 08:05 AM

I believe I was misinformed then. I thought that even if the child was born out of wedlock, the mother would still need the father's permission in order to apply for a passport and to take the baby out of the country.
Based on your answers I now understand that until I get with the court I don't have any rights.
At this time my only option is to get a loan and put the money in the hands of a good attorney so that this matter can finally be solved.
Thank you guys for all the answers.

#6 pg1067

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Posted 08 February 2013 - 11:00 AM

I believe I was misinformed then. I thought that even if the child was born out of wedlock, the mother would still need the father's permission in order to apply for a passport and to take the baby out of the country.


That's a good point (hence the reason I phrased it as a question), and it does appear that, despite the state law parental rights issue that both Ted and I covered, you are correct that she will not be able to get a passport without your consent if you are identified on the birth certificate. See http://travel.state....html#step7minor.

Nevertheless, the sooner you get a custody/visitation/support order in place, the better.




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